


The Hawke Family Adventures

by zephsomething



Category: Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age II
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-29
Updated: 2019-03-03
Packaged: 2019-04-29 10:36:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 19,405
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14470797
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zephsomething/pseuds/zephsomething
Summary: So we all know that Varric lies, or at least over exaggerates in his stories (especially to protect his friends) but what if in this case it wasn’t Varric who lied, what if it was Hawke herself (well Hawke first, the Varric later)?Here’s what we know (based on one particular playthrough of mine):1) Marian Hawke is a clever tongued mage and the eldest of the Hawke siblings.2) Carver has lived in his elder sisters shadow and at his twins side his whole life.3) Both Varric and Hawke see nothing wrong with bending the truth4) twins run in familiesSo what if it went like this, at the beginning, when the Hawke family is escaping the blight? There is no ‘eldest Hawke sibling’ only ‘the elder twins’ and ‘the younger twins’I'll add tags as they come up





	1. Deals and Compromises

**Author's Note:**

> I'm posting this mostly so I have to finish the fic however long it takes me, updates will be irregular and it's Low Priority compared to my other long fics.  
> Not that this fic isn't dear to my heart but I am writing Many Things and I'm sure this idea has been done before so...

Lothering burned behind them as the fled the darkspawn. Bethany held Mother’s arm while Carver brought up the rear but Marian only knew that because she knew them so well. She was entirely focused on the way forward. Kirkwall Mother had said, but it would be a long trek and for the moment the roads were lousy with darkspawn. Garret, as always, was at her side holding his shield at an angle to designed protect them both. So of course it was Marian who saw the knight and the Templar first and it was Marian who charged full tilt into the battle to save them anyway.

“Keep your distance apostate.” The Templar said, or sputtered really, he was barely standing and it was all Marian could do not to laugh as Bethany came to stand beside her.

“Well the maker has a sense of humor.” Bethany let out a little huff that was almost a laugh, if a sardonic one. “Darkspawn and now a Templar, I thought they’d all abandoned Lothering.”

The Templar said something about the hoard and mages and his order but Marian was busy watching the way the knight watched him. Not that she knew the redhead was a knight but there was something about the way she stood. Then he stepped towards the two of them and Marian wasn’t sure who moved first, her or Garret. They stood together between the Templar and Bethany, Garret’s shield still in his hand.

“Dear they saved us,” the knight reached forward to touch his arm. “The maker understands.”

Then she introduced them and made a crack about hating each other once they’d escaped the hoard. Their names were Aveline and Weasley, they were married and trying to escape the hoard just like Marian and her family. Amused by their answers to her questions Marian made a crack about Weasley being gentle for a mage hunter. Bethany muttered about pressing their luck, and then they were all heading south together, intending to help each other escape the hoard.

Then they were attacked on all sides on the clearing their winding path led to. The first wave of the darkspawn wasn’t so bad but then the troll came charging up a path at them. Marian’s first thought was _shit that_ _’s big_ , followed closely by _Bethany no_ as Bethany readied her staff and stepped towards the thing. That seemed all the prompting that it needed though because before Marian could pull her back Bethany was flying through the air. It was all Marian could do to magically cushion her fall. It wasn’t until after the troll fell dead in the dirt Marian could even check if Bethany had survived.

“I’m fine sister,” Bethany made a swatting motion as Marian knelt beside her. Marian made a disbelieving noise in response, she was clearly not fine at all. “Really, a bit of healing and I’ll be good to go.”

“And then we can simply ask the darkspawn not to attack you and mother while we travel yes?” Marian frowned as she let her healing wash over Bethany. Behind her Mother made a tragic sort of noise but Marian ignored her for the moment.

Then there was the sound of darkspawn approaching. Marian made as if to stand but then the dragon showed up. The first blast of fire took care of the majority of the approaching darkspawn and its claws finished the rest. As Marian planted herself firm the dragon stepped forward and shrunk, or something, it was hard to tell with all the heat and the light. Then there was a woman standing in front of her, clearly old and clearly powerful but the first thing to pop into Marian’s head and straight out of her mouth was “Now that’s a useful trick, turning into a dragon.”

“And what if I’m a dragon who can turn into a human?” The corners of the woman’s eyes crinkled just the slightest bit and Marian took it as laughter. “I suppose then you’d simply be grateful that the smell of burning darkspawn does nothing for the appetite.”

“And here I was just thinking it was making me crave roast.” Marian grinned, the easy sort of grin that had fooled many a guard into thinking her to charming to be a mage.

“Now this one I like.” The way she said it Marian wasn’t entirely sure it was a compliment. “Such a clever tongue for a mage.”

“What do you want?” Garret came to stand beside her, shifting slightly as if his shield would be any use against the woman, or dragon possibly.

“What do I want?” She repeated it as though it was the first time she’d ever been asked such a thing, as if it was worth consideration. “A great many things I suppose, at the moment though… I spotted a most curious sight, a mighty ogre vanquished who could perform such a feat?”

Then she made as if to leave, walking a few steps back the way she’d come.

“You’re just going to leave?” Carver sounded disbelieving, and rather annoyed.

“And why not?” She turned and raised an eyebrow at him. “My curiosity is stated and you are safe, for the moment.”

“Couldn’t you help us? We need to get to Kirkwall.” Garret took half a step forwards before thinking better of it.

“Don’t suppose you’d be able to teach me that trick?” Marian stepped passed her twin’s shield. Some small part of her warned against making deals with wandering mage dragons but she paid it little mind. “It looks useful.”

“Indeed it is clever child,” She let out a laugh and turned away again. “Hurtled into the chaos you fight, and the world will shake before you.”

“Right…” Marian raised an eyebrow at Garret who shifted one shoulder. “So can you help then?”

“Is it fate or chance? I can never decide.” The woman murmured as she turned to lay an appraising eye on the two of them. Suddenly Marian felt sure she was being judged though for what she wasn’t sure. “It appears fortune smiles on us both today, I may be able to help you yet.”

“Just like that?” Marian raised an eyebrow. “There’s always a catch.”

“There is always a catch! Life is a catch.” She laughed again and it sounded just as strange as the first time. “I suggest you catch it while you can.”

“Can we even trust her?” Carver called out from where he stood beside Bethany. “We don’t even know what she is.”

“I do.” Aveline spoke up for the first time and Marian turned to see her crouched beside Weasley. For his part Weasley was looking rather worse for wear, clearly no longer able to stand and his veins pulsing black. “She’s a witch of the wilds.”

“Some call me that yes.” The woman gave Aveline the sort of smile a grandmother might give a particularly cheeky young child. “Also Flemeth, asha'bellanar, an old hag who talks too much.” The chuckle she let out was at once amused and chill inducing. “Does it matter? I offer you this I will bring most of your group passed the hoard in exchange for a delivery to a place not far out of your way. Would you do this for a witch of the wilds?”

“More fire is always appreciated.” Garret nodded slightly.

“Fry a few more darkspawn and I’ll do whatever you want.” Marian said at the same time.

“There is a clan of Dalish elves near the city of Kirkwall, deliver this amulet to their keeper Marethari, do as she asks with it, and any debt between us is paid in full.”

“What do you mean most?” Carver demanded striding forwards to stand nearly in front of Marian, between her and Flemeth.

“That one can’t fly, and the other won’t make it.” Flemeth gestured first at Bethany then Weasley. Aveline made as though to snarl something at her but she simply shook her head. “What has been done to your man in within his blood already.”

“Its true love,” Weasley spoke in something between a groan and a whisper. His veins still pulsing black beneath his skin. “I can feel the corruption in me.”

“I take it this corruption is of the permanent sort?” Marian looked quizzically at Flemeth who inclined her head just slightly.

“I can’t…”

“It’s a slow painful death love.” Weasley pressed a dagger into Aveline’s hands. “Please.”

Aveline looked away from him, then up at Marian as though asking her for something.

“I can’t make this decision for you, he’s your husband.” She shook her head and stepped back towards Bethany. Her mind was turning a mile a minute but she couldn’t think of a way around the truth of what Flemeth had said. Bethany was in no state to fly.

“You go.” Garret said it so quietly Marian almost missed it, she was sure no one else had heard it.

“What?” She turned to stare at him. Stared at the face that had only very recently stopped being a mirror of hers. It was only within the last year or two that his jaw had gotten stronger and her cheekbones higher. The sudden appearance of facial hair contributed as well.

“Take Carver and Mother and go.” He gestured to where Flemeth was waiting. “I’ll stay with Bethy.”

“I need you.” Marian felt like a child saying it but it rung true regardless.

“Bethy is in no state to fly, she can’t even stand yet.” Garret shook his head. “She’ll need a shield to get through this.”

“But-”

“You’ll have Carver.” He reached out and gripped her wrist, and old and comforting gesture. “And you’ll have Mother to worry about.”

“Garret-”

“We’ll be fine.” He stepped back and Marian knew the conversation was over. She squeezed his wrist in return and took a deep breath.

“Alright then, Mother, Carver, let’s get a move on.” Marian tucked the pendant into her pocket and raised an eyebrow at Aveline. “Are you coming?”

“Yes.” Aveline dropped the now bloody dagger beside her husband and picked up his shield.

“What about Bethy?” Mother sounded close to hysterical so Marian wrapped an arm around her waist.

“Garret will bring her along.” She led her mother to where Flemeth was waiting, not entirely patiently.

“Your troubles have only just begun, it gets no easier.” Flemeth waited for Marian’s nod before twisting away. Sort of twisting away anyway, light and heat poured off of her and a moment later a dragon looked down on them. Carver and Aveline were scooped up in one claw, Marian and Mother in the other, and then the ground fell away from them with such speed Marian found herself wondering if it had really been there at all.

The flight across the wastes was a mix of terrifying, exhilarating, and uncomfortable. Then Flemeth landed near the edges, not far from Gwaren, and let them down. She fixed her stare on Marian for a moment then, apparently satisfied, she swept her wings up and within moments was just a pinprick in the sky.

The ship ride to Kirkwall was worse by far. Two weeks pack into the hold of the ship with dozens of other fearful or desperate fleeing from Ferelden and the blight. To make the ride that much more enjoyable Mother could hardly look at her without bursting into tears, and Carver made it clear he found her at fault for it all. If he could have found a way to blame the blight on her she was certain he would have. Aveline was quiet but at least she didn’t seem inclined to lay the blame entirely at Marian’s feet. All considered it didn’t take long until Marian started to have the creeping feeling that they never should have come here. Her first sight of Kirkwall, crying statues and a building that looked like more like a prison than anything else, hardly helped.

Aveline was the first to note that Kirkwall didn’t seem keen on letting in all the Ferelden refugees, not that the observation surprised anyone but Mother. The next shock was when a guard by the name of Captain Ewald told them that their Uncle Gamlen wasn’t a noble at all. Once Gamlen was finally located and brought out to see them the hits really just kept coming. Of course that didn’t happen for three entire days.

“Let me just say I wasn’t expecting this.” He’d gestured to the lot of them but kept his eyes on Mother. Something in his manner made Marian instantly suspicious. “The blight, your husband dead. I’d ah, figured you’d be Ferelden for life.”

“Oh Gamlen, we came too late.” Mother was on the verge of hysteria again but Marian found herself too tired to do anything about it. “My darling Bethany, and Garret as well, Adraste guide them.”

Marian barely resisted rolling her eyes, Mother spoke like they were both dead already. There was plenty of chance they were on their way, a few weeks away at most.

“Oh maker save me Leandra, don’t drop this on me.” Gamlen rubbed at his head, clearly Marian wasn’t the only one who was too tired to deal with Mother’s moods. She was however finding it rather difficult to sympathize with Gamlen. “I don’t even know if I can get you into the city.”

“What about just Mother?” Marian raised an eyebrow, without Mother to worry about Marian was sure her, Carver, and Aveline would be fine. Garret would have said the same thing she was sure, though for different reasons.

“No.” Mother snapped the word out. “We stay together.”

“I was hoping to grease some palms but the knight-commander has been cracking down.” Gamlen said it like it was perfectly normal for a Templar to be in charge of refugee admissions. Marian frowned up at the Gallows, the name of the prison looking building, she already didn’t like this place. “We’re going to need more grease.”

“But…” Mother trailed off with a frown. “What about the estate? Surely father left something when he died.”

“Right about the estate… It’s ehm… gone.” Gamlen stumbled over the sentence and Marian felt her suspicions growing. “To settle a debt, I’ve been meaning to write you.”

Marian hid a disbelieving snort under a cough as her mother sighed about hope being gone.

“Not entirely, I know people who might be able to help.” Gamlen shifted his hand in a way Marian was sure he meant to be pacifying. “If you’re not too delicate about the company you keep.”

“Alright let’s hear it uncle.” Marian gestured with the hand not holding onto her staff. “What do you have in mind?”

“I’ve talked to my contacts in the city and I’ve found some people who might be willing to pay your way in.” From the tone in his voice Marian had been ready to ask him about the catch when he continued. “The catch is you and your brother will have to work off the debt, for a year.”

“A year!” Mother exclaimed but Marian just raised her eyebrows at Gamlen.

“It’s the best I can do.” Gamlen said looking at Marian now rather than Mother. “Trust me when I say a bunch of refugees wouldn’t get a better deal anywhere else.”

“What’s a year? We’ve got plenty of those.” Marian let one of her more charming smiles show on her face. “It’s about the only thing we have plenty of.”

Carver made a disapproving noise, and Mother gave a little wail of despair but Marian turned her smile on Gamlen and ignored them.

“Yes, well.” He frowned at her for a moment before seeming to remember himself. “I managed to convince my contacts to come to the Gallows to meet you personally. Merran heads up the Red Iron. They’re looking for recruits. Athenril… I guess you might call her a smuggler. Either one might help you, you just have to find them in the courtyard and convince them you’re worth the trouble. ”

After a brief interrogation of Gamlen Marian learned that the smuggler dealt in everything but flesh and tried to avoid killing, the mercenary seemed equally straight forward. Both were more or less well known and either seemed as likely to be able to protect them. A quick meeting with each of them proved both her suspicions about her uncle and the feeling she got about each of them. The fact that they both knew she was a mage unsettled her momentarily but after a quick talk with Carver they settled on the mercenary. It wasn’t that she didn’t like the elf well enough but Carver like Merran and Marian would rather fight than haul boxes any day.

The fight with the noble who’d crossed Merran and his guards lasted barely a moment. As the noble hit the ground Marian reflected that it was rather thoughtful of the man to pick such a secluded hiding spot. Aveline got a little furrow in her brow as Carver snorted. Walking back to tell Gamlen and Mother who they’d picked Marian got the strangest feeling that everything was about to change. She wrapped her fingers around the amulet in her pocket and smiled up at the clear sky.


	2. Growing up Hawke

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A flash back to a series of moments throughout the Hawke families life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Carver and Bethany are 2 and a bit years younger than Garret and Marian. 
> 
> Also for simplicity's sake I'm using the English alphabet for their literacy lesson.

 

“Come now, it’s not that bad love of mine.” Father gestured around their latest house. He seemed unaware that Mother’s shouting had woken Marian so she kept her eyes shut and pretended to sleep. Mother wasn’t wrong either, the new house was even worse than the old one and the rats were bigger here. “Besides home is where the heart is and my heart is wherever you are.”

“Your charm doesn’t make the smell any better.” Mother snapped it out. Behind her closed eyelids Marian could picture exactly what they’d look like. Father’s blue eyes, so much like hers and Garrets, twinkling against dark skin and a wide grin. Mother’s arms crossed and her sternest frown on, like the one she’d worn the first time she told Marian no one must ever find out about her magic.

“Come now love you’ll wake the younger twins, you’ve already woken Marian.”

“Sorry.” Marian blinked to find her Father’s warm smile turned on her rather than Mother. “I did try to sleep honest.”

“That’s alright little one, I never slept much at your age either.” Father scooped her up and from his hip it was easy to see the glare her mother was sending the walls. The glare that turned back to Father as he started humming.

“She’s nearly seven, I don’t see why she can’t just sleep through the night like Garret or the babies.” The glare was still directed at Father but Marian buried her face in his shoulder anyway.

“I’m awake too Mother.” Garret’s quiet voice came from the mat Marian and he shared. She peeked over to see him walking over to Mother. “I’m just better at pretending.”

“I didn’t mean to…” Mother trailed off, all the anger gone out of her all at once. Marian felt the familiar burn in her chest, she wanted more than anything to be more like her twin. To just be able to make people calm, to be smart and normal and not always make a mess of everything. When she wasn’t making a mess with her words it was with her magic.

“Little Marian, it’s okay, it’s alright.” Father murmured stroking the tangles out of her hair. She hadn’t even realized she’d started crying. “Come, let’s sit and sing by the fire.”

As soon as Father sat on the big chair by the fire Garret climbed up and wrapped his little fingers around her wrist. Marian squeezed back automatically as Father started singing a lullaby. Garret joined in and a few minutes later Marian trusted her voice enough to do the same. It didn’t take long until Mother joined in as well. Despite all the noise they’d made neither Bethany nor Carver woke up. They simply curled closer together. They last thing Marian noticed before drifting off was how soft Mother looked, staring at Fathering, singing, and lit only by the fire.

——

“And what’s that letter Bethany?” Mother pointed to the letter on the book she’d put on the table that morning.

“E.” Bethany said after a seconds hesitation.

“Very good, and Carver what sound does it make?”

“Eh, or Ee.” Carver’s eyes tracked a bug across the little table, clearly just waiting to be dismissed.

“Good good, now Marian, what’s the word say?” Mother looked preemptively disappointed and Marian clenched her fists in her skirt. “Sound it out Marian.”

Marian worked her jaw as she stared at the letters. She knew she should know the word but it just looked like scratches. “What does it matter if we learn to read? We won’t need it.”

“Just read the word.” The disappointment had seeped into Mother’s voice and Marian glared at the book because she’d never get away with glaring at Mother.

“Why don’t you ever ask Garret?”

“Because Garret could tell me the whole sentence.” A bite of annoyance had joined the disappointment.

“Make.” Garret said before Mother or Marian could say anything else.

“That was supposed to be Mari’s turn.” Carver pointed out. “I waited for Bethy.”

“Don’t call me that.” Marian snapped out. She stood fast enough to knock over the crate she’d been perched on and grabbed her staff. “It’s not like we’re ever going to be anything other than farm hands anyway!”

“Sit back down.” Mother’s tone held a warning but Marian stormed out of the house before she could do anything.

When Garret found her, and it was always Garret who found her, she was deep in the woods and practicing staff work. Which mostly meant hitting trees hard enough to leave dents in her staff.

“You made Mother cry again.” He announced as he sat on a nearby log.

“She made me mad first.” Marian swung her staff to hard, knocked herself off balance, tripped over a root, and landed in the dirt at Garret’s feet. “It’s hardly my fault you’re perfect.”

“Mother doesn’t mean that.” He helped her up and she dropped onto the log beside him. “Besides you’re better at everything important.”

“Nothing important to Mother.”

“Fighting and gardening and chasing dogs and taking to townsfolk and hiding.” Garret counted them off on his fingers as if she hadn’t spoken.

“I have to be, I’m the reason we have to hide anyway.” She stared up at the sky.

“Father has magic too, so does Bethy.” He bumped her shoulder. “And Father would say that eight is much to small to be putting all the problems on your shoulders.”

“Father would phrase it better.”

“Father is old.” Garret kept a completely straight face for exactly three seconds, right until Marian raised an eyebrow at him, then they both burst into giggles.

Eventually their giggles faded and Marian sighed.

“I still don’t understand why we have to learn to read.”

“Because Mother was a noble.” Garret jumped up and snatched up a stick. Holding it like a sword and striking a pose. “That makes us nobles too.”

“I thought noble dressed a bit better.” Marian smirked and picked up her staff. “Plus you don’t fight like a noble.”

“Wanna bet?”

By the time they left the woods and headed home it was dark and Garret was covered in dirt, though Marian wasn’t exactly squeaky clean herself.

——

“Be careful Bethy!” Mother’s voice drifted after her but Bethany was already running. They’d just arrived in the town, if you could even call it that, but Bethany saw a group of other kids her age playing. The bonus of being six was Mother and Father didn’t expect her to help like they did the older twins.

“Hello! Can I play?” Bethany skidded to a halt in front of the group of children she’d spied earlier.

“Who’s the new kid?”

“Yeah where’d you come from?”

“Nearest town proper’s ages away.” The oldest, or at least the biggest, of the group walked forward. “You must belong to that cart that passed over there.”

“Probably.” Bethany agreed easily. “My family just moved here.”

“Hm.” A girl who’d come to stand nearby sniffed and tossed her hair. “She’s too little.”

“She’s bigger than Avery.” The oldest of them said calmly, then looked back at Bethany. “I’m Alec, she’s Isa.”

“I’m Bethany.” She kept the wide grin on her face but this was the part she hated. The part where all the other kids sized her up and decided whether she’d have to work to be their friend. “What game were you playing?”

“Kick ball.” A kid so small they could only be Avery frowned at her. Then they pointed to where some sticks had been hammered into the dirt. “Gotta get it in the goal.”

“Avery!” The girl who’d sniffed glared at them but Avery just shrugged. Maybe she was just always like that.

“Come on, we can play our own game.” Avery turned their nose up in the air and grabbed Bethany’s hand. “Where we don’t have to listen to Isa.”

“Avery!” This time her voice held a note of warning but with a conspiratorial sort of grin at Bethany Avery started running.

When they finally stopped running, way out in the fields in a patch of reeds that rose above their head, Avery grinned at her again.

“Isa’s my sister. She’s supposed to look after me.” As they explained it they dropped into a sitting position. “Mama is gunna be so mad she let me run off.”

“Shouldn’t we go back then?” Bethany frowned towards the town.

“Nope. Isa’s being a right jerk.” Then Avery dug around in the reeds a moment and unearthed a small package. Once opened it revealed a small hand carved flute. “Besides, I’d rather play than kick a ball around anyway. Isa’s just trying to impress Alec.”

“You talk a lot for a little kid.” As she said it Bethany dropped into a sitting position next to them. She was going to get muck on her dress but she didn’t care so much right now.

“I am almost six.” They tossed their hair, doing a fair impression of their sister. “Plus mama says I’m awfully talented. She just doesn’t want to send me away somewhere.”

“What sort of sound does that make?” Bethany gestured at the little pipe.

Avery grinned at them and brought it to their lips. The music that came out of it sounded strange, lighter than it should. The air around them took on a strange sort of feeling. Like they were sitting inside a star. When Avery finished their song Bethany clapped delightedly.

“That's magic!”

“You can’t tell anyone.” Avery’s face suddenly took on that pinched and fearful look Bethany knew well. So she reached a hand out towards him and let her own magic pool around her fingers.

“I won’t if you don’t.” Her smile was answered with a wide grin.

“I’ve never met anyone else like me.” Avery caught her hand as she pulled her magic back in. “Mama says I get it from Pa but he’s long gone.”

“You have no one to teach you?” Bethany’s breath caught in her throat at the thought. “That’s dangerous, how will you know how to control it? We have to tell Father.”

“You said you wouldn’t tell!” Avery jumped up all at once.

“Father can help! He’s teaching me.” It was Bethany’s turn to grab Avery’s hand. “It’ll be okay, I promise.”

——

“Ha! Who’s fighting like a noble now?” Garret swung his stick and Marian lifted hers to block. Blocking his hits was still pretty easy she thought, her staff length stick gave her the advantage.

“Still you.” She smirked and dropped. At the same time she swung her staff out, it went under his shield, cobbled together from bark and scrap wood, and she knocked his feet out from under him. “Ha!”

“Not fair!” He glared as she crouched nearby. From him the look was far from intimidating.

“And what? You think every fight you’re in is gunna be fair?” Then she stood and offered him a hand.

He rolled his eyes and took the offered hand. It was an old argument and at this point that was really all he needed to do for her to know his answer.

“Father says to use every advantage life gives you, I’m just following his advice.”

“And your advantage is what?”

“That I’m smarter than you.” She grinned as he ruffed her hair. It had long since worked it’s way out of the elaborate braids Mother had put it in that morning.

“And messier.” He noted dryly.

“I swear one of these days I’m going to swipe Mother’s sheers and chop it all off.” She used her fingers to mime the motion, chopping it to higher than her jaw.

“Mother would be devastated.”

“Then she shouldn’t get so invested in my hair.” Marian lifted her staff back up to the guard position. “Ready to get beat again?”

“I do win sometime you know.” He brought his sword and shield up as well.

For a few minutes the patch of dirt they were playing in rang with the sound of sticks hitting each other. Then there was a distressing crunching sort of noise and Marian let out a string of swears that would have made Mother blush.

“Marian!” Garret stared wide eyed at her.

“You broke my stick.” She held the two pieces up. “I’m not a dual wielder, I’m a staff fighter.”

“Very impressive.” The voice was deeper than any they knew and they both whirled to face it. Garret automatically lifting his shield so it blocked Marian as well as himself. At the edge of their dirt patch was a man who was both taller and wider than their father and wearing the unmistakable colours of their current town’s guard. “Tell me boy who’s been training you?”

“I’ve picked things up here and there.” Garret shrugged his face carefully blank as he looked the guard over.

“Training isn’t really our thing you know.” Marian frowned up at the guard. “What can we do for you? Though if you want directions you should know we just moved here.”

“I have an offer for you boy.” The guard continued as though it wasn’t Marian who’d spoken at all. “I’ve trained my whole life using a sword and shield, I could train you. You’ve got enough natural talent.”

“What’s the catch?” Marian tried again. “There’s always a catch to these things.”

“Well what do you say?” The guard tried for a winning smile.

“I’d have to ask Father, I doubt we have the coin for training.” Garret took Marian’s hand behind his shield as she started twitching. She didn’t do well with being ignored.

“Oh you wouldn’t have to pay me.” He let out a hearty chuckle that made Marian glower. “I have plenty of free time and my kids are grown and gone these days.”

“I’ll ask.” He repeated, tapping a slow pattern onto the back of Marian’s hand. Reminding her to calm down.

“You do that, while your at it he should probably see the local seamstress.” The guard grinned like he was telling a joke. “I hear she gives free lessons in cleanliness and etiquette to any who need them.”

“At least my parents taught me not to ignore and criticize strangers.” Marian snapped out. “Lessons you’re clearly unequipped to teach anyone.”

“We should got before Father worries.” Garret pulled her back a few steps as the guard’s face started to change colours. “Thank you for the offer though.”

Garret took off towards home and didn’t go of her hand until they were deep in the orchard behind the house.

“Oh I could just, arg!” Marian clenched both her fists as mana sparked along her arms.

“We’d be dead and cooked if you did and you know it.” Garret reached over and placed his hand on her head. “You gotta calm down or Mother is going to be upset.”

“And we only just got her I know.” Marian took a deep breath, and then another, as Garret ran his fingers through her hair. In the minutes it took her to calm down he’d worked out the tangles and re-braided her hair. She looked down at her hands for a moment before speaking. “It’s just, whenever anyone else has been like that it’s because of…”

“Your magic?” Garret finished as she shook her hands. “I wonder what his problem was…”

“Dunno, maybe he’s just a jerk.” Marian dropped down into the dirt and laid back so she could see the sky. Garret settled down next to her but stayed sitting. After a quiet moment Marian spoke again. “You should take the lessons though, if Father says yes.”

“But he was a jerk to you.” Garret frowned down at her.

“Yeah but you can learn sword stuff without learning to be a jerk.” Marian shrugged. “Besides who else is going to teach you? Mother?”

“Not unless I really want to fight like a noble.” Garret chuckled and tapped a rhythm out on his knee.

——

“Up the hill, up the hill, to fetch a pail of water,” Marian practically skipped as she sang the song. She’d been singing it nearly constantly since they moved to this town, it was built on a dozen little hills and their house’s water well was at the very top of one of them. “Don’t fall down, you’ll break your crown, and we’ll come tumbling after!”

“Stop singing that!” Mother called after her, also not for the first time. “There are so many nicer songs.”

Pretending she couldn’t hear Mother Marian simply moved onto the next verse. She’d sung the whole thing through a dozen times by the time she’d pilled the pails she’d been sent with.

“You have a lovely voice Da'len, who is it who taught you to sing?” Marian turned to peer at the owner of the voice. The woman was not much taller than Marian herself but her posture made her seem so much taller. Marian instantly wanted to learn how to stand like that. The woman’s eyes seemed to laugh as she spoke next. “I do not bite Da'len, I’m just a curious old elf that’s all.”

“Why would I think you bite? That’s just silly, only babies and scared things bite.” Marian waved a hand as though waving away the notation. “Father taught me, though it’s not so much teaching as singing together.”

“Did he also teach you to use your staff to carry more buckets?” She gestured down at the staff Marian had stuck through the handles of her buckets.

“It’s not a real staff, just a long stick I found.” She shrugged. “It’s as useful as a stick as it is a practice staff.”

“You should take care of your weapons, even false ones.” She smiled and held out her own staff. It looked like little more than a stick itself until Marian touched it.

“What is it?” She breathed out the word, running her finger tips along the staff. It had the texture of wood but strength like nothing Marian had ever dealt with.

“It’s ironbark.”

“Who are you?” Marian frowned at her. She knew of ironbark but it didn’t seem the sort of thing a random town elf would be able to have.

“I am Nari, this staff is the only thing I have ever been able to keep possession of.” Nari smiled as Marian tilted her head in consideration. “And you?”

“Marian, you should come to our house for tea.” Marian grinned and hoisted the buckets onto her shoulders with her stick. “As long as Mother and Father say yes.”

Nari laughed at that but when Marian started down the hill she followed. Marian spent the walk chattering about her family, Carver’s latest complaint, Bethy’s latest group of friends, Garret and Carver’s training with the local guard that Mother and Father had just barely been able to afford, and Mother’s constant fuss about Marian’s hair.

“Mother! Father! I found a guest for tea!” Her voice echoed around the small house. Though it wasn’t as small as the last one, at least they didn’t all have to squish in one bedroom.

“Marian what have I said about unannounced g-” Father stopped in his tracks as he came into the room and saw her guest. “Nari?”

“Malcom?” Nari let out a laugh that rang throughout their house. “I thought the girl seemed familiar.”

“How did you?”

“A mage never reveals their tricks.” Nari’s face had taken on a look Marian recognized, it was the one Garret would give her when they had a joke.

“Not if they can help it.” Father strode forwards to clasp Nari’s hands. “I’m glad to see you doing well.”

“Same to you.” Nari glanced down. “Married with kids is not how I thought you’d turn out.”

“Ah well, we keep moving that’s all.” Father shrugged. “Do you remember Leandra?”

“The Amell girl? No wonder you left.” Nari laughed again, like everything in the world was funny. Marian decided it wasn’t just her stance she wanted to learn. “How is she then? Adjusting to a life spent moving?”

“Who’s this then?” Mother’s voice came from the kitchen door, the one that led out to the little patch of dirt they called a garden.

“Don’t you remember Nari love?” Father turned to Mother with a wide grin. “From Kirkwall?”

Marian stayed very quiet in the silence that followed. They all knew Mother and Father were from Kirkwall of course, they just never spoke of the city. The kids had learned better than to ask about it.

Then Mother smiled and the tense moment passed. The adults set about making tea and setting up the small table to accommodate an extra place. In that one afternoon Marian and her siblings learned more about Kirkwall than they had in their whole lives.

——

Carver paced around the edges of yet another new house in another new town. He’d only just convinced the guards from the last one to show him some sword tricks too. It was getting harder and harder to convince them as he got older and still didn’t have a sword of his own. He and Bethany would be seven soon but there was no way he’d get a sword. They were to expensive.

“Carver go play.” Marian seemed to appear in front of him from no where. If it weren’t for her magic Carver figured she’d make a decent rogue. “All your pacing is driving me crazy, I’m trying to practice.”

“I’m not in the way, you go somewhere else.” Carver crossed his arms as she spun her staff. Her new staff. His glare deepened as he watched it’s movement. One her and Garret’s last birthday Garret had gotten a wooden sword and shield set, basically toys. Marian had gotten a new staff, not a toy, and made special just for her. All because it turned out she had an ‘affinity for healing’ according to some other free mage a few towns back. Carver snapped out of his thoughts to see Marian looking thoughtfully at him. “What?"

“Your face is going to stick like that.” She smirked and tapped him on the head with her staff. It didn’t hurt but for a solid second he debated crying anyway just to get her in trouble. As if she could see it on his face Marian waved her hand. “Don’t bother, Mother’s gone into town already and Father’s looking for wild herbs.”

“Your face is wild herbs.” Carver muttered as he stormed passed her. It didn’t make any sense but he didn’t care.

“Sure thing Carver.”

“You shouldn’t get him all worked up like that.” Garret’s voice just barely reached Carver as he stormed into the nearby trees. Whatever Marian said in return he didn’t hear, already to far into the bush.

He didn’t stop until he was far enough in that he could hear nothing but forest sounds. Then he picked up the biggest stick he could find and started swinging it at one of the larger tree trunks. He tried out a few of the moves he’d seen the guards using but even without someone there he knew he wasn’t doing them properly. He just didn’t know how to fix it.

“Not bad, poor control but it would get the job done.” Carver whirled towards the voice and brought his stick up to the guard position automatically when he saw the insignia on the man’s armor.

“You’re a templar.” He glared at him his mind going a mile a minute.

“There is a chantry in town.” The templar nodded as if being threated with sticks was just part of the job. “Your stance is to wide and your sword is to far away from your body. Scoot your feet in, shoulder width apart, one foot forward, sword across your chest.”

“Why are you here?” Despite changing his positioning as instructed Carver was still scowling at the man.

“I often take walks through these woods, well I call them patrols to the mother but…” The templar trailed off and shrugged. “So is someone teaching you how to use a sword? Your father perhaps?”

“Father is a staff fighter.” Carver put the tip of his stick on the ground and leaned on it. “Mother taught me some Orlesian fencing but that not really a useful kind of fighting.”

“Fancy.”

“I’ve got some training from guards too, just not here…” He added it quickly and then trailed off glaring at the dirt. “We move a lot see.”

“Well if you ever want some training here feel free to swing by the chantry.” The templar grinned at him. “It’s not like there are tons of apostates coming to town for us to hunt, we mostly just sit around playing cards.”

“I’ll try.” Carver said it quickly and tried not to show the sudden inner battle those words had caused. There was no way Father would agree.

——

“So what exactly were you planning here then?” Marian raised her eyebrows, looking entirely unimpressed. “Hoping that no one would notice the sound of a hurt pup?”

“What’re you gunna do about it?” The largest of the boys leaned towards her menacingly. To be fair to the boy if the girl he was talking to were anyone other than Marian Garret was sure that move would have worked.

“So glad you asked, because I love telling people just exactly how I’m going to beat them before I do so.” Marian nodded, completely unfazed by the fact that they were outnumbered three to one and that even the smallest of this gang was bigger than her. Garret was sure they’d fought worse odds, he just couldn’t recall when right now.

“It’s the runt of the litter, even it’s ma didn’t want it.” One of the boys pointed out gesturing to the pup in question. It was rather small for a mabari.

“That doesn’t mean you beat and drown it.” She twirled her staff and Garret sent a prayer to any gods who might be listening that she would be able to keep her magic in check.

“Alright then.” Garret sighed, clearly it was going to be a fight now. Though with Marian involved it rarely wasn’t. “I suppose if you insist then we’ll have to fight you.”

“If we insist?” Another boy snickered. “Ain’t that cute, the grunt worker’s kids think he’s educated.”

“Oh and what? You are?” Marian’s smirk grew as she leaned on her staff. “Go on then, I’ll give you the first hit.”

In a way it was almost good they moved so much, Garret very much doubted there was any way that would work twice on anyone. The boy, having never seen it before, stepped forward and swung his fist at Marian’s face. It was a dumb move for several reasons but Garret didn’t think the boy had ever fought someone trained with a weapon before. Marian ducked his fist, stuck her staff out, and swung her elbow into his back in one motion. It was a motion that had gotten smoother with every fight they’d gotten in. Luckily for Marian they got in a lot.

One down, winded more than hurt, and then the others charged. Garret lifted his wooden shield and used it to knock aside the first boy who reached them. Beside him Marian’s staff twirled but he focused on keeping them off her side. One of their fists swung towards him and he knocked it aside with the flat of his wooden sword. From experience he knew that wrist would sting for a while. Another charged him and he braced for impact. As they hit his shield he twisted using their own momentum to throw them right over his shoulder and into the dirt.

The fight was over quicker than it had started. The area around Marian’s eye was already bruising, she’d have quite the black eye tomorrow, and Garret could feel the muscle in his shoulder twitching. The boys who’d attacked them however were all covered in dirt. Several had bruises forming and the one who’s wrist Garret had hit winced every time he moved the hand. Garret hope he hadn’t done to much damage to the boy.

“Fine, let the weirdos have the runt.” The biggest one snarled and shoved the pup towards them with his boot. “I’ve seen their place, one of them’ll be loosing meals to feed the thing.”

Marian scooped the pup off of the ground with one arm and Garret saw several raised eyebrows among the boys before they followed the biggest back towards town. The pup might have been a runt but it was still a mabari, they weren’t small dogs by any means.

“There now, we’ll get you all cleaned up I promise.” Marian ran her fingers over the pups fur. “Won’t we Garret?”

“You know they’ve got a point Marian.” Garret said it quiet enough there was no way the boys would hear now that they were walking in separate directions.

“Other than the ones on their heads?”

“About food, you know we already don’t have much.”

“He’s a mabari.” She waved her staff. “In a few month he’ll be able to hunt for his own.”

“You get to argue the point with Mother.” He held up his hands.

“They can’t argue with this face anyway.” Marian grinned down at the pup and Garret knew anyone who tried would have lost before they started. “Can they Freedom?”

“Really? Freedom?”

“It’s a good name for a good pup.”

——

As Father paced around the edges of their little practice court Marian and Bethany sparred. The sound of their staffs hitting each other drowned out almost anything else.

“Good Marian but put more power behind your swings, Bethany remember you stance. If you don’t have that you have nothing.” As he spoke Marian felt a spark of annoyance, which quickly turned into an actual spark from the tip of her staff. “Control Marian, let no one see the magic you hold in your hands.”

“Yes Father.” Marian’s next hit still sparked but it was smaller.

“Marian you’re old enough other people already see an adult when they look at you.” From his tone Marian knew he was frowning, even if he wasn’t in her line of sight. She blocked Bethany’s next hit and her next strike would have knocked the staff from Bethany’s hands if she hadn’t pulled it. As it was Bethany had dropped her hand off the staff and was shaking it out. “I wont always be around to protect you two, you need to learn to watch yourself.”

“We know Father.” Marian turned to look at him. “The big bad templars want to lock us up. You’ve been telling us since we started showing magic.”

“Then show it.” He gestured for them to go again. Marian spun and brought her staff up to block Bethany before she’d even fully turned.

As their staffs clinked together Marian settled into the rhythm of it. Block, hit, hit, block, twist, block, hit, and again and again. Once she was focused on the rhythm it was easy to block everything else out. She didn’t even notice Bethany’s frown until Father called the end of their practice. Once Father left to go do whatever it was he did to make money Bethany touched Marian’s arm lightly.

“What do you think he meant? All that talk about not being here forever?”

“Well I mean it’s not like mages have a particularly long life span.” She was mostly joking but at the look on Bethany’s face she shrugged. “Look I don’t know what goes through his head most of the time, no matter how much alike people say we are.”

“I think they just say that because of your looks.” Bethany giggled and for a second looked so much like the child Marian often forgot she was. “I mean you’ve got those killer blue eyes and the darker skin, so does Garret course but he doesn’t take up the room like you and Father do.”

“I don’t take up the room, what does that even mean?”

“It’s like,” she paused for a moment, clearly thinking about her answer. “You and Father you just have this presence, like you can do anything you know? Makes people trust you.”

“Oh you mean that sign on my forehead telling everyone I can solve their problems?” Marian snorted. “I’d like it removed, if I hear one more person complain that so and so wont talk to them and can’t I just- ugh.”

“I think Carver would trade you, if he could.”

“I’ll send them his way then.” She said and tugged on her braid. “Maybe that’ll help with the stick in his-”

“Marian!”

“Sorry but you know it’s true.” Marian tugged at her braid again. “I’m so done with this thing, can you check if Mother is inside?”

“Why?”

“I’m going to swipe her shears and chop it off.”


	3. New Friends, New Plans, and a New Life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Marian and Carver make friends in Kirkwall, Marian also puts some good progress towards making enemies.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This all takes place over the course of a year, give or take a couple months.

 

The first year in Kirkwall was rough. Between working in a mercenary company and living with Gamlen Marian spent much of the year wondering if facing the blight wouldn’t have been better. At some point Mother stopped outright blaming Marian for what happened to Bethany and Garret but their distance still obviously hurt her than it did Carver or Marian.

Their meeting with Bartrand went about as well as Marian had expected it would. He dismissed them as money chasing refugees, Carver did nothing to help their case then insulted her, and she insulted him back. The part she didn’t expect was Varric but then again, she figured few people ever expected Varric. He didn’t seem the type.

“Your plan sounds like a mad scheme.” Marian frowned down at the entirely to charming younger brother and thought the whole thing seemed like an act.

“We don’t have a better one though, do we?” Carver raised his eyebrows at her though he made no more mention of ‘her templars’ so it was an improvement.

“Why  should I believe that your word and 50 gold, if I can scrape it together, will be enough for Bartrand?”

“You’ll just have to trust me won’t you?” Varric grinned.

“I barely trust my brother,” she ignored Carver’s protests as she spoke. “With no better options however I suppose your mad venture will have to do.”

“Perfect!” Varric gestured to the city as though presenting it to her. “Let’s get started then.”

 

—

 

Before she started on any of Varric or Gamlen’s suggestions for making money though, she had a promise to keep. The Red Iron had kept her and Carver far to busy to even attempt a trip up the mountain looking for Dalish camps but there was plenty of time now.

So the next time Avaline wasn’t busy she dragged her, Varric, and Carver on a fun family trip up Sundermount. Only Varric was amused.

The Dalish, once they found them, were not exactly welcoming but they didn’t shoot her on sight so she counted it as a win really. They directed her to their leader, er Keeper, who directed her to her First. The strangest part of the whole thing was the Keeper’s instance that once they were done with the amulet they’d have to bring her First back to the city.

When they found her the First, who introduced herself as Merrill, rambled on about whether or not it was offensive to ask a human their name. Marian was rather distracted by how cute she was. Merrill rather reminded her of a kitten.

“You’ll have to try harder than that to offend me.” She grinned when Merrill trailed off. “My name’s Hawke.”

“Your name is Marian.” Caver’s tone said he was rolling his eyes, behind her Aveline snickered. “Everyone calls you Hawke for some unknown reason.”

“It’s because I’m the eldest.” She grinned at him as Merrill frowned at them with an air of polite confusion.

“Whatever.”

“Well let’s go perform this ritual then.” Marian grinned and gestured up the hill.

“It’s more of a funeral actually, I’ll perform it when we get to the mountain top.” Merrill glanced up at the mountian. “Getting there is the tricky part, our hunter’s haven’t been able to reach the summit. Dark things are about.”

“Let’s get going then.” She just barely resisted twirling her staff and settled for guesting again at the path.

Tricky was a bit of an understatement for the trip up the mountain in fact. They were set upon not only by giant spiders and animated corpses but also but at least one spirit. All that was even before they reached the bit of the mountain where a glimmering veil blocked the path.

“It’s was sealed.” Merrill pulled out a knife as she walked towards it. “I have to just-”

There was a sort of implosion near Merrill’s hand and a spray of red. Then the veil pulsed and collapsed. Both Carver and Aveline made noises of confusion.

“That was blood magic.” It felt like stating the obvious but Marian found, despite all her training to the contrary, that she was curious more than anything else.

“I know what I’m doing.” Merrill was frowning again. “And it helped didn’t it? The demon.”

“Oh sure they’re very helpful.” Marian nodded, that much wasnt the problem after all. “Right up until they turn you into an abomination.”

Merrill frowned for a moment and everyone managed to hold their tongues. Then Merrill stepped towards the now open path. “In the days of Arlathan the elders came here to sleep, Uthenera. The endless dream they called it. But they sleep peacefully anymore.”

About that it turned out she was quite correct. No sooner had they walked through the graveyard than a dozen spirits and corpses rose. The fight was quick but bloody. Carver ended up with a scrape on his arm Marian had no doubt she would hear about for weeks and Aveline’s shield, Weasley’s shield, got a new dent.

Then Merrill put the amulet on the alter and said a few words. As she stepped back there was a flash of light and Flemeth stood before them. Merrill immediately dropped into a bow and said something in quick and quiet Dalish.

“Ah, one of the people, then stand. The people bend their knee to quickly.” Flemeth turned to look at Marian as Merrill stood straight again. “So refreshing to see someone who keeps their end of a bargain, I half-expected my amulet to end up in a merchants pocket.”

“No one wanted to buy it.” Marian raised an eyebrow as Carver made an annoyed sort of noise. “Maybe because it had a witch inside?”

“Just a piece, a bit of security, should the inevitable occur.” Flemeth’s smile looked like she was letting them in on a joke. Though a joke about what Marian wasn’t really sure. “And if I know my Morrigan, it already has.”

“Is that someone I should know?” Marian cocked her head. The name seemed familiar, like something from a story.

“She’s a girl who thinks she knows what is what better than I or anyone.” Her laughter still had that strangely ominous quality to it. Marian wasn’t sure whether she was pleased that had survived or not. “And why not? I raised her to be as she is, I cannot expect her to be less.”

“I’m not sure if she’s your daughter or your enemy.”

“Neither is she!”

“You have plans then I take it?” Marian gestured as she spoke, it seemed the mostly likely reason to put a piece of your soul in an amulet anyway.

“Of course, before I take my leave however a word of advice?” Flemeth actually paused and waited for Marian’s nod before she continued. Marian found she was less surprised about that than she would thought she’d be. “We stand upon the precipice of change. The world fears the inevitable plunge into the abyss. Watch for that moment… and when it comes, do not hesitate to leap. It is only when you fall that you learn whether you can fly.”

“Cheap advice from a dragon.” Marian chuckled, though something about the advice rung very true.

“Are we going to regret bringing her here?” Carver’s voice was never as quiet as he thought it was. Flemeth fixed her strangely bright eyes on him.

“Regret is something I know well, take care not to cling to it so closely that it poison the soul.”  Then she turned to Merrill, clearly on a roll with this whole giving advice thing. “As for you child, step carfeully. No path is darker than when your eyes are shut.”

Merrill responded with something in Dalish that Marian understood just as much as she’d understood the first thing Merrill had said in Dalish. Which is to say not in the slightest bit.

“Now the time has come for me to leave. You have my thanks, and my sympathy.” And with that ominous pleasantry Flemeth turned glowing so brightly Marian was forced to shade her eyes. Then in dragon form Flemeth leapt from the cliff and quickly disappeared into the sky.

 

——

 

The next pretty elf Marian met, Fenris, requested her help with the murder of the slave master he’d run away from, which as far as she was concerned was a brilliant start. That was right up until they found that the ex-master they’d planned to kill was long gone. At least that was what Marian assumed he was mad about. She searched the mansion for valuables before heading outside to meet him.

“It never ends, I saw you casting spells inside.” He started as soon as she walked out the door, pacing back and forth. Then he came to a stop in front of her. “Tell me, what manner of mage are you?”

“You want me to tell you and spoil all the fun?” She smirked and though his face twitched he didn’t even crack a smile at her charm.

“You are skilled I saw that much.” He frowned at her.

“If you have a problem with my sister you have a problem with me.” Carver stepped forward like he was going to physically fight him about it. Marian shifted her staff just slightly to block his path.

“I must appear ungrateful, I can assure you nothing is further from the truth.” Fenris sighed and frowned up at the manor. Marian was beginning to think that was just what his face looked like all the time. “I did not find Danarius, but I still owe you a debt, should you ever din yourself in need of assistance, I would gladly render it.”

“Why does this Danarius want you anyway?” She tried for charming but she wasn’t sure her tone was quite there. “There must be more to it than just being a runaway slave.”

“These marks on my skin are brands of lyrium,” the gesture he made at himself was terse, almost annoyed. It matched his tone. “Danarius intends to get them back even if it means ripping them out of my skin.”

“Seems like a waste of a perfectly handsome elf.” This time Marian was sure her tone was charming, and she even managed to get Fenris to crack a smile. Somehow that felt like a bigger victory than the fights against the demons Danarius had left behind had.

 

——

 

When Marian learned that Gamlen had left Grandfather’s will at the estate he’d given over to slavers her first thought was that even her Uncle couldn’t possibly be that stupid. Her second was that she needed to get her hands on that will. It didn’t take much to convince Carver that they should go get it. All she had to do was point out that she was going with or without him. Fenris offered to come along as soon as he heard they’d be fighting slavers and Varric said there was no way he was missing this pivotal of a plot point. With that many weapons the fight went quick, even when there proved to be a mage on the slavers side. He was no match for Marian.

“Here it is.” Marian opened up the vault with the key they’d gotten off of Mother. It was tucked in with some armor and coin. Marian pocket the coin and tossed the armor to Carver. “This looks like it’ll fit you.”

“So this is Grandfather’s will?” He gestured for her to hand it over. “Let’s just take it back to Mother and be done with it.”

“True. No point in delaying the news.” She headed back to the exit. “Read it to me while we walk why don’t you?”

“In front of?”

“Don’t be silly Carver, Varric and Fenris are perfectly trustworthy.” The point might have got across better if Varric and Fenris hadn’t both had to stifle laughs as she said it. “I’m sure Varric will only tell very nice stories about our uncle.”

“Unlike the rest of Kirkwall.” Fenris’ voice sounded almost sarcastic. Marian hadn’t been sure he was capable of joking, clearly she was a good influence. Carver however seemed unimpressed by the lot of them. 

“Fine, tell me once they go off to their own very busy lives.” Marian rolled her eyes and held opened the door that led back out to darktown.

“Come on then broody,” Varric slung his arm around Fenris. “You heard the lady, we have very busy lives to get back to.”

“I wouldn’t call her-”

“I’ll remember both of you said that.” Marian called after them before raising her eyebrows at Carver. “Well? What does it say?”

By the time they reached Gamlen’s house they were feeling very little sympathy towards him. No matter why Gamlen hadn’t told Mother even a tiny portion of what Mother had been left would have changed their lives as children. Any they might have still harbored vanished as they walked in on him saying Mother should start contributing to the monthly expenses.

“You should be paying us Uncle.” Marian interrupted him as they walked in. “We found the will.”

“Grandfather left everyone to Mother and us.” Carver sat down and got to work on his new armor. “I guess he had some sense after all.”

“See for yourself.” As she handed the will to Mother she made direct eye connect with Gamlen.

“Eh, Ah, I should… maybe…” He rubbed at the back of his neck.

“For my daughter Leandra, and all children born of her,” as she spoke Mother’s voice gained strength. “The estate in Hightown and all associated revenues.”

“Check out the part where Gamlen is left only a stipend-” She smirked as she said it. “-to be controlled by you”

“Gamlen how could you…”

“You’re the one who ran away, Leandra.” Gamlen said irritable. Marian wondered if he was irritated about the past or just that they’d found out. “What happened to ‘Love is so much more important than money?’”

“It is!”

“You didn’t even come home for the funeral!”

“Carver and Bethany were a week old!”

“We all have our burdens.” His voice went from irritable to angry like a twig breaking. “Mine was looking after a life you abandoned! How long was I supposed to wait?”

“I doubt you even let the ashes get cold.” Marian couldn’t help the derision in her voice.

“I took care of Father, I stayed! And on his deathbed all he could talk about was Leandra!” He’d started gesturing angrily. It wasn’t that Marian wasn’t sympathetic to his reasons but he’d done so poorly with all he’d been given and she’d spent her life with almost nothing. “Look sister, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have done it. But I did.and there’s nothing I can do to get it back.”

“It’s enough to know Mother and Father didn’t die angry.” Mother waved a hand. Someone more poetic might have thought she was waving goodbye to her past, Marian thought she looked like she was waving away Gamlen’s anger. “I’ll petition the viscount for rights to reclaim the estate. Maker willing , you'll have your house back within weeks.”

“You don’t have the standing or the coin to even get an audience with the viscount.” He sneered. “You have to Be Someone in this city to live in that house again.”

“Then I’d better get started.” Mother turned and walked out so decisively Marian almost expected her to come back with a title.

 

——

 

On Varric’s insistence that they needed a ‘good entrance’ to the deep roads Marian went in search of the mysterious Grey Warden. She found him openly healing people in Darktown. It seemed an odd place for a Warden and she told him as much. He talked a while about the Grey Wardens and having to get rid of his cat but Marian wasn’t really paying much attention. The number of different facial expressions Fenris was making while he talked was rather distracting.

“I’m going into the deep roads.” Marian forced herself to focus on the Warden rather than Fenris. “I’ll pay for any information you have.”

“If I wanted to make money I’ve been going about this all wrong.” She was about to admit he had a point there when his posture suddenly shifted. “Although, a favour for a favour, does that sound fair?”

“Let’s be more specific.” Marian smirked slightly. “I don’t do anything involving children or animals.”

“That’s not true, you saved a little girl and her kitten just last week.” Merrill pointed out and it startled a laugh out of Marian.

“Fair point, I don’t do anything to harm children or animals.”

“I have a Warden map of the depths in this area but there’s a price.” His eyes darted between the two of them and Marian could almost see thoughts forming in his head. “I came to Kirkwall to aid a friend, a mage. A prisoner in the wretched Gallows.”

He continued on for a while about the templars and his friend as Marian asked questions. Fenris put in a few of his usual comments about the dangers mages pose. Eventually they got to the actual point of his request though. He wanted them to help him get his mage friend out of the circle.

“You want me to fight Templars?” Marian raised an eyebrow at him. “I might rather take my chances with the darkspawn.”

“Fighting Templars is exactly what we’ve been trying to avoid.” Carver added.

“If we fight Templars it is because they decided that anyone who befriends a mage deserves death without questioning.” He made a sort of slashing motion with his hand as though to underline his point.

“Oh I’m sure they’d want to question us first.” Marian shrugged.

“These are my terms. If you agree to them meet me at the Chantry tonight.” He shrugged. “Maker willing we’ll all walk away free.”

A few hours and several arguments later Marian met Anders at the Chantry, alone. She’d sent all the other’s to their homes to sleep or brood or whatever it was Merrill did at night. The most remarkable part of the night was when Anders’ went all blue and crackly. The second most remarkable part was when his blue crackliness seemed to reverse the fact that his friend had been made tranquil, if only for a moment. Marian voted they kill the poor man, being tranquil was the worst fate she could think of. Anders slipped away as soon as they left the Chantry but Marian beat him back to his ‘clinic’.

“So let me guess?” She was leaning against a pole as he walked in.“You’re an abomination?”

“You’re wrong, but not far wrong. I… this is hard to explain.” He sighed looking like this was an unpleasant but not unexpected visit. Though perhaps one he would have rather she put off. “When I was in Amaranthine, I met a spirit of justice who’d been trapped outside the Fade. We became friends, and he recognized the injustice that mages in Thedas face every day.”

“And this has what to do with your eyes glowing?” Marian raised her eyebrows.

“To live outside the Fade he needed a host. I offered to help him.” Anders shrugged. “We were going to work together, bring justice to every child ever ripped away from his mother to be sent to a circle but… I guess I had to much anger. Once he was inside me, he… changed.”

“So you just have this spirit of justice living in your head?” Her eyebrows felt like they could go no higher.

“It’s not like that, he’s gone now, he’s part of me. It’s not like we… have a conversation. I feel his thoughts as my own.” He shifted slightly as he spoke, clearly uncomfortable though in Marian’s opinion he wasn’t nearly uncomfortable enough. “Not even the greatest scholar could tell you where he ends and I begin.”

“So he’s a demon now?”

“No!” Now he was starting to look annoyed, though mostly it seemed defensive. “He is a spirit whose only purpose is to see the innocent saved and the guilty punished.”

“That really didn’t look like a happy benevolent spirit from when I was standing.”

“Since when is justice happy? Justice is righteous. Justice is hard.” Then all at once the fight seemed to go out of him. “I thought I was helping my friend. He would have … died, I guess. If that even means anything. And he wanted to help me, he knew what mages have suffered.”

“Of course, no harm can possibly come from good intentions.” Marian sighed and just barely stopped herself from rubbing at the headache she could feel forming.

“Normally I would argue that but…” He trailed off and sighed. “My anger, when I see Templars now, things that have always outraged me, but I could never do anything about. He comes out and he is no longer my friend justice. He is a force of vengeance and he has no grasp of mercy.”

“Could you be separated?” Marian frowned, she’d never heard of being able to separate a demon from it’s host but she’d also never heard of that host not becoming an abomination right away. “Or bring him out at will?”

“No we are bound together now.” He shook his head slowly. “And he comes out only when I have lost all control over myself.”

“Wow, your problems really do put mine in perspective.”

“Here.” He handed a folder of papers. “These are all the documents I have on the area, I understand if you would rather me not join you personally, I cannot control my need for vengeance and would ask no one to take on the danger of traveling with me.”

Marian tucked the folder away with a nod.

“I will be here at the clinic if you need me.”  He said as she turned to walk away.

“I’ll keep that in mind.” She tossed the words over her shoulder as she left. It was unlikely she’d need him, with her also being a healer and all, but perhaps his expertise might come in handy in the deep roads. She’d have to keep it in mind.

 

——

 

“Come on Aveline, I can’t possibly be the _only_ person you spy on.” Marian leaned against the doorway as Aveline walked past her yet again. Aveline was doing a very impressive job of pretending Marian didn’t exist, it was fooling exactly zero people. “You’ve got to tell me what he’s been doing, or who he’s been doing. Is that why you wont answer me? It’s because Carver’s seeing someone isn’t it?”

“I am right here sister.” Carver sounded tired more than annoyed as he exchanged eye rolls with the guards he was playing cards with.

“Hmm you have a point, I doubt there’s anyone who wants to be seeing someone who spends all their time following their sister around.” She nodded as he rubbed at his forehead. Then she turned back to Aveline. “So where’s he going at night then?”

Aveline stopped walking, then put her hand to her forehead, then turned and gestured at Carver. “He’s right there, just ask him.”

“Oh but that’s no fun.” Marian tried for a pout but from Aveline’s expression she wasn’t successful.

“I’ve been playing cards at the hanged man.” Carver put in after a moment of quiet.

“Boring.” Marian pushed herself off the wall and followed Aveline as she moved from spot to spot around the barracks. “So when are you coming out with us next? It can’t be all that busy being a guard.”

“I told you already Hawke, I can come with you whenever you need me.” Aveline put down the armor and cleaning supplies she was holding. “But only when you actually need me, not just to watch you break rules.”

“Oh come on I don’t break them, just bend them a little.”

“It’s absolutely against the law to at least half the things you’ve done.” One of the guards put in while Aveline frowned.

“Who asked you?” Marian raised an eyebrow at them.

“No one ever does.” They sighed and stared up at the ceiling like it might hold answers for them.

“It’s been _ages_ since you came adventuring with us.” She drew the words out until they hardly sounded like words at all.

“Its only been a week Marian, what about your other friends?” Aveline sighed and raised an eyebrow at her. “The broody elf or that dwarf?”

“Or Merrill? Merrill is fun.” Carver added.

“But none of them frown like Aveline does.” Marian turned to frown at Carver. “You know, that twitchy frown she gets when I start bending the law? Where her eyebrows go in and-”

“Marian.” Aveline’s tone was the exact kind of tone that had stopped all number of children from doing the thing. It had never really worked on Marian.

“Yes that expression.” Marian grinned at her. “That’s the exact one.”

“Uhhggg.” Aveline dropped her head to the table and made a shooing sort of gesture. “When I look up you’d better be gone.”

“Or what? You’ll arrest me?”

“I’ll do everyone’s paperwork for weeks and you’ll never see me or my frown again.”

“Fiiiiine.” Marian flounced off towards the stairs. “Come on then Carver, let’s go find someone who wants to go adventuring.”

Carver’s sigh was possibly the loudest one Marian had heard from him yet. A very put upon sounding noise. It was almost impressive.

 

——

 

Marian had really just been planning on having a drink with Varric when she walked into the Hanged Man but that was before she saw the three guys in the corner that had a very pretty girl surrounded.

“You owe us Isabella.” One of them leaned towards her.

“Well Lucky, I’ll tell you what, since the information you gave me is worth nothing,” she poured herself a drink looking entirely unconcerned about this Lucky. “That’s what I’ll pay you.”

The guy, Lucky, reached out an grabbed the top of her drink. “Me and my boys will get our money’s worth bitch.”

Then just as Marian was about to step in she noticed that Isabella still didn’t seem bothered, in fact she was leaning towards Lucky.

“Oh you poor sweet thing.” Then Isabella’s hand was on his wrist and his head was hitting the counter top. As he stumbled back one of his boys grabbed Isabella from behind and she slammed her head back into his nose. Then as he dropped her the other of Lucky’s boys swung a bottle that was no doubt intended for Isabella but hit the one who’d just dropped her in the side of the head instead. She grabbed bottle boy’s shoulders and slammed her knee into his stomach a few times. As he dropped Lucky reached for his sword but Isabella had her dagger at his neck before it was even unsheathed.

“Tell me Lucky?” She raised an eyebrow at him. “Is this worth dying for?”

Clearly it wasn’t as Lucky and his boys decided to walk, or stumble as the case may be, out of the bar.

“I didn’t think so.” Isabella muttered with a dry sort of laugh. Then she turned back to the bar and took a swig of her drink. Marian walked up to her as she put the glass down. Her smile was something between flirty and wary and it was a combination Marian had truly never seen before. “You’re new around here aren’t you? Welcome, and keep your wits about you. You’re nothing but tits and ass to men in this place and they wont hesitate to grab both.”

“Speaking from experience are we?” Marian grinned back at her.

“After a few broken fingers here and there I think they got the idea.” As she continued she did a funny little bow that seemed almost sarcastic, though mostly directed at herself. “I’m Isabella, previously captain Isabella sadly without my ship the title rings a bit hollow. You’re Ferelden aren’t you? You have that look about you. I was in Denerim not to long ago. You know, you might be just what I’m looking for to solve a little problem I have.”

“You and everyone else in this city.” Marian said with a put upon sigh and a glance at the roof. Really though Isabella seemed like someone who would at least be fun to help.

“Must be something in the water. Someone from my past has been pestering me. I’ve arranged for a duel, if I win he leaves me alone but I don’t trust him to play fair.” She gestured at Marian in a, this is where you come in, sort of gesture. “I need someone to watch my back.”

After a bit of discussion on the who, what, where, and when of the situation Marian agreed. It rarely took much to convince her to fight these days especially if it was a pretty girl doing the asking. Then again maybe that something in the water idea was worth looking into.

 

——

 

Not long before meeting Isabella Marian had seen an argument between a pretty boy and a sister at the Chantry over something he was putting up. The job was simple, his family had been killed kill the mercenaries who did it. So of course Marian had accepted the job and killed them all. When she tracked him down to tell him the job was completed he was inside the Chantry.

“So, will anyone smite me if I tell you I killed the men who wronged your family?” Marian asked as she walked up to him.

“Excuse me, who are-? My post on the Chantry board? Did Her Grace let that stay? I thought no one would even read… but you say you killed them?” He stumbled over his words for a moment before a look of relief passed over his face. “You have my eternal gratitude, serah! It is comforting to think my parents might now rest easily in their graves”

“So who are you anyway?”

“I am Sebastian Vael, prince of Starkhaven.” He gave her a strange little bow, tiny and stiff, then chuckled like there was a less than funny joke she was missing out on. “Her Grace might prefer I introduce myself as a brother in the Cantry but I could not stay after what happened to my family.”

“Why didn’t your family’s enemies hunt you as well then?” As Marian asked it Carver made a disapproving noise behind her but she figured it was a fair question.

“That’s why I took the offensive! Thanks to you, those Flint company assassins are no longer a danger.” His face had taken on a strange quality, like he was lit from within by some kind of fire. Though a far healthier sort of fire than some other people Marian could name. “I am the last of my line. Unless I survive, my family will have no Justice.”

Everyone seemed a little obsessed with justice lately, at least from Marian’s point of view. She picked a new topic instead. “Who sent the mercenaries?”

“My family has ruled Starkhaven for six generations. We have enemies but none who would identify themselves openly.” He paused for a moment as though thinking it though and then shrugged. “A distant cousin of mine is claiming ruler ship now but he is… a bit simple. He can be no more than a pawn in this plot.”

“Surely you have at least a guess?” Marian raised an eyebrow slightly, teasing more than anything else.

“My parents were always… prudent, in how they handled our nobles. They did not allow rivalries or resentments to flourish. The attack must have come from outside. Kirkwall is our largest trading partner.” He gestured vaguely around the Chantry. More or less indicating the entire city. “I came back here to find support for my claim and perhaps for a clue as to who is behind this foul deed.”

“Your parents probably don’t care much at this point but I hope you at least might sleep a bit sounder.”

“Yes, I will.” He chuckled again. Marian was beginning to wonder if laughter was his response to everything. “Thank you. Consider this an advance, when I have secured my lands again you will be paid royally.” As he was walking away he called back over his shoulder. “Now if you’ll excuse me I must meet with the viscount and petition him for aid to a fellow city.”

And then he was gone, off out the door to talk to the viscount. Marian found herself laughing. This Sebastian seemed like he was going to be an interesting addition to the city. The only thing she couldn’t figure out was how the Chantry had gotten him in the first place.

“You liiiiike him.” Carver’s voice took on an almost sing song quality as they left the Chantry.

“He seems nice enough.” Marian shrugged and Carver waggled his eyebrows at her. “Oh come now Carver you know I have a type, nice enough doesn’t really fit it.”

 

——

 

“And then she finally wanted to go adventuring but it was only because of this conspiracy!” Marian waved her hand in the air. It was the easiest way to gesture from the laying position she’d ended up in on a bench in Fenris’ mansion.

“Right…?” He drew the word out like a question which Marian supposed was fair, she’d been ranting about Aveline’s lack of adventuring for quite a while now.

“Well of course I said yes, anything to drag her out of the blasted barracks, I swear she’d never leave if I didn’t make her.” Marian frowned at a crack in the ceiling for a moment before continuing. “And you’ll never guess what happened.”

“It was a conspiracy?” His voice was so dry Marian turned her frown on him trying to decide if he was attempting humor or if he was just bored. His face, though pretty, gave her no further clues.

“It was!” She let out her longest sigh yet. “The guard captain was setting up guards as sacrifices to pay of debts. I said he should have been a politician, setting up his own people like that.”

Fenris made a noise that was so close to a laugh Marian found herself grinning at him. His attempts to school his expression again were to late to properly hide the smile that had been on his face. “He would have fit in well in the Imperium as well.”

“That’s a joke, you’re making jokes.” Had she been just a little younger Marian might have clapped, she was now older and wiser than that. So she did the far more dignified thing, she repeatedly punched the air.

“You’re a very strange human.”

“Yes because you’re such an ordinary elf.”

“A fair point.”

“In any case Aveline is guard captain now.” Marian sighed again but she was far to cheered by Fenris joking to put much effort into appearing upset. “So now I’m never going to pry her away from the guard.”

“And why does this bother you again?” Fenris raised his eyebrow slightly.

“She’s my friend.” Marian said, then when his expression didn’t change she continued. “We escaped the Blight together”

“You keep strange friends Hawke.”

“I have stranger, you for instance.” She grinned at him but he just got a sad little frown. “Fenris?”

“Yes Hawke?” He sounded almost worried and Marian wanted very much to just be able to use brute force to fix his traumatized feelings.

“You’re my friend Fenris.” She sat up so she could properly look him in the eye, at least as properly as she could with him avoiding looking at her. “Do I have to paint it on your walls or something? We’re friends, that’s why we help each other and hang out and what not.”

“If you say so Hawke.”

“I do and we are.” She said and reached out to rest her hand near his knee, not quiet touching him in case he didn’t want her to. “And you can call me Marian you know, I think everyone calling me Hawke bothers Carver anyway.”

“I am well aware.” His little frown was replaced with the tiniest hint of a smile.

“Oh, well in that case feel free to continue annoying my brother.” She grinned and grinned even wider when he awkwardly patted her hand.

 

——

 

The knock on the door was quiet which is how Marian knew it was for her. When people knocked on Gamlen’s door for him they were rarely interested in courtesy.  Marian blinked for a moment when she opened it, trying to decided if Varric was actually standing on her doorstep in the middle of the night.

“Merrill hasn’t been home in a few days.” He said after a moment of waiting. “I think she’s lost.”

“A few days?” Marian yawned and rubbed at her face. “Kirkwall isn’t even that big.”

“What Now?” Gamlen opened his bedroom door and glared at Marian.

“What’s happening?” Carver poked his head into the main room at the same time as Gamlen did.

“Merrill’s lost, up for a late night search?” Marian raised an eyebrow at Carver and ignored Gamlen entirely.

“Well I’m awake now.” He yawned and picked up his sword from where it rested beside their door.

“Pants first then sword.” Marian snickered and Varric hid a laugh (poorly) behind a cough. As Carver went back into their room to get dressed she attached her staff to it’s holder. Then she picked up the belt that held all her potions and tricks and pulled that on.

“Alright let’s go Merrill hunting.” Carver grinned as he came back out of their room, with pants this time.

“That sounds bad, like we’re trying to hurt her.” Marian mused as the door closed behind them. “Merrill rescuing?”

“Merrill saving?”

“The grand search for Merrill?”

“You two should have a comedy act.” Varric waved his hands around. “Come one come all to see the Marvelous Hawke and her assistant, the smaller Hawke.”

“Thanks, really Varric.” Carver sighed and shook his head. “So where do we start then?”

“Well I was thinking the gardens, Daisy often turns up around plants.”

“Any chance that by gardens you don’t mean the ones on the viscounts private estate?” Marian asked.

“If you know of any other gardens by all means?” He gestured and she just sighed. “No didn’t think so.”

“Why oh why can’t she just get stuck in a tree like a normal child?” Marian sighed extravagantly.

As it turned out she wasn’t in the gardens at all, or the Hanged Man, or any of Lowtown at all. Eventually they found her on a little out hanging bluff you had to climb to from Darktown. It overlooked the gallows which she was glowering at. They brought her back to the Hanged Man for some truly awful drinks and some truly delightful company.

Three drinks in, for Merrill, and five drinks in for Varric he produced a large ball of twine from Maker only knows where.

“Now Daisy.” He looked at her seriously, or seriously for someone holding a ball of twine in one hand and their sixth drink in the other. “You tie one end to your door and then you wont get lost anymore.”

“You rhymed.” Merrill giggled, then hiccuped.

“Twine, door.” Varric put it in her hands and patted her on the shoulder.

“Come on then Merrill, let’s get you home.” Marian stood up and held out a hand to Merrill. Merrill promptly put the ball of twine in it and started giggling again. “Right… Here Carver you carry that.”

“But, Cards.” Carver gestured at the game he was playing (loosing) with Isabella.

“Drunk tiny elf.” Marian gestured to where Merrill was happily and loudly trying to explain blood magic to Varric. Luckily for everyone most of what she was saying was in Dalish and the rest was punctuated by hiccups.

“Right, fine.” He put down his cards and took the twine. “You win Isabella.”

“I always do.”

“It’s because you cheat.” Marian grinned at her as she scooped up Merrill.

“You’re very strong Hawke.” Merrill blinked a few times. “Like a, a something, something that’s strong.”

“Thanks Merrill.” Marian chuckled as she headed for the door. “I think it’s more than you’re about as heavy as a sparrow.”

 

——

 

It was the fifteen month anniversary since they’d had to leave Bethany and Garret behind in Ferelden and Mother had been snappish all day. Marian wasn’t feeling to grand herself either but it wasn’t like they could change anything now.

“I’m going out for air.” Gamlen snapped as Mother made irritable noises for the thousandth time that day. At this point Marian didn’t blame him.

“This would all be better if Bethany were here, she was always so good at housework.” The doubly pointed comment had Marian on edge immediately. “And Garret would be able to keep you out of trouble.”

“With two more it would have cost even more to get in.” Marian frowned at her. “Would you have wanted Bethany to have to join smugglers or mercenaries?”

“Better than her being dead!” Mother let out a sort of wail that set Marian’s teeth on edge.

“She’s not dead!” Carver snapped from the other side of the room. He looked seconds from following Gamlen out the door. It had always been Bethany who was best at calming Mother, followed by Garret.

“Exactly. It just takes longer to get to the ship on foot than it does by dragon.” Marian gestured towards Carver.

“But we don’t know that for sure! For all we know the darkspawn got them, or some bloodmage, or who knows what else off alone in the wilds.”

“You’re working yourself up Mother.” Marian sighed and glanced towards their rather meager supplies. “How about some tea?”

“Why did you even agree with that Mage Woman.” Mother said the words like they were swears, like Hightown and Chantry folk said them. “Leave Bethany and Garret to the wolves while we get scooped up and carried off to the ships.”

“They’ll make it to Gwaren Mother, then they just have to get a ship to Kirkwall, it’s just the journey we planned to take originally.” Marian said carefully. “And the blight is over, all they had to do was stay a bit ahead or it for a while.”

“Bethany was injured! How do we know-”

“We don’t Mother.”  Carver snapped again, rising to stand beside Marian. “We just have to believe in them.”

“Whatever we should or shouldn’t have done it’s done now.” Marian added quietly rubbing at the headache she could feel forming.

“Exactly, now you can sit here and stew but we’re going to go out and do something.” Carver said and walked towards the door. For the first time in ages it was Marian following him out.

They walked through Lowtown in silence for a while, until Carver broke it.

“She has a point you know.” His voice was quiet and his eyes looked far out and away. “We have no idea.”

“We know Garret, and Bethany.” Marian said it in an equally quiet voice. “Bethany always made friends everywhere we went and Garret is Garret.”

“But we don’t Know.” He frowned at her as she shrugged. “You’re right of course, you always are.”

“You said it first, we just have to believe in them.” Marian clapped him on the shoulder and then gestured towards all of Lowtown. “Want to find some trouble to take your mind off of it?”

“Absolutely.” He nodded. “After you sister.”

 

——

 

“Okay so we’re doing what again?” Marian raised an eyebrow in a bemused sort of expression as she followed Merrill through Lowtown, Fenris trudging grumpily behind them.

“Well Sarri has been having trouble with spiders in the basement, and Atthon has a problem with the templars constantly knocking on his door because his nieces daughter is a mage and she ran away from the circle, and Elora has an unwelcome suitor.” Merrill listed off tapping a finger for each name.

“And?”

“I said we could help!” Merrill grinned at her. “You’re always helping everyone else.”

“Fair enough, long as they don’t mind-” Marian waggled her fingers instead of finishing the sentence and Merrill just grinned in response.

“Right so I’m here because..?” Fenris gave Merrill an entirely unimpressed look which only grew more unimpressed as her grin widened.

“Your frowning broodiness!” She said it so cheerfully it almost sounded like a compliment. “It’s really helpful! Honest!”

He looked half a second from turning and storming back off to his mansion in Hightown so Marian walked backwards so she could grin at him as well.

“Come on Fenris, it’ll be fun.” She threw her arms out to the sides as she spoke but luckily everyone in Lowtown was well trained to give her a wide breadth. “Helping elves, making friends, glaring at and or hitting people. It’s at least two of your favourite things!”

“Fine.” He glanced away and got a pained expression that Marian was fairly certain was him trying to avoid smiling.

“Fantastic!” Merrill grinned at them and all but skipped ahead to knock on a door. The elf who answered was haggard looking and had a tiny one hanging off her skirts.

“I swear they’ve doubled in size since you were here last.” The woman, Sarri no doubt, gestured into the house. “Basement stairs are right at the back. I don’t know how they got in but I want them gone and however they got in blocked somehow.”

“Course.” Marian gave her a half bow on the way past. “Giant spiders Merrill? How did you find giant spiders in the middle of the city?”

“I live next door.” Merrill gestured and then frowned. “But you know that, of course, so, oh, sarcasm again.”

“Strange friends Hawke.” Fenris muttered and Merrill looked back and forth between them before opening the door at the bottom of the basement stairs.

The giant spiders, which indeed they were but none poisonous so Marian couldn’t them lucky, were easily dealt with. The tunneled passage they came in through proved a bit more of a challenge but between Merrill and Marian they figured it out. All it took was a little magic, and a fair amount of frowning about it by Fenris, to pull nearby roots and dirt closer together and make more of both to reblock that passage.

“I doubt they’ll come back through Sarri.” Merrill shook her hand and patted the child’s head as they left. “Sorry it took so long, Hawke’s awful busy these days.”

“It’s no trouble though, I don’t want giant spiders in the city anymore than you want them in your basement.” Marian put in as Sarri gave them a tired sort of smile.

“I don’t have much…”

“We don’t need anything, unless it’s rude to refuse, Hawke is it rude-”

“Take a breath.” Fenris muttered from behind them and Merrill stopped talking with an audible click.

“Fenris be nice, it’s not rude, and we don’t require payment.” Marian rattled off. “Really you did everyone a favour bringing us in to get rid of them before they spread.”

“Thank you.” Sarri’s tired smile remained as she closed the door on them.

The templar Atthon was having issues with and Elora’s unwanted suitor, who turned out to be the same person, were also easily dealt with. Between Marian’s snark and Fenris’ glare they were convinced to never go near the alienage again. Of course it was entirely possible they believed that doing so would result in highly painful consequences. By the end of the day Merrill was downright cheerful despite the fact that none of them were richer in anything but experience.

 

——

 

“Honestly I’m rubbish at sailing, and I don’t like being on boats anyway.” Marian insisted but Isabella was giving her the ‘I call bullshit’ face so she frowned. “Okay listen I know someone who knows someone who knows someone who own a little fishing vessel. I helped them out once so I’m pretty sure I could commandeer it for a day. I’ll prove it to you.”

“You know someone huh?” Isabella’s look was getting progressively more suggestive the longer Marian spoke. “Helped them out once?”

“I saved their kid from being sold into slavery, don’t you start making up stories about me too.” Marian held up a hand. “Yours are so much more uh….”

“Entertaining than Varric’s?”

“We could use that word, it’s not the word I was thinking but we could use it.” Marian nodded and Isabella’s laughter turned heads. The two of them together often turned heads though so it was nothing new. “We need to bring Merrill if we go sailing though, she’s been after me to let her try for ages, like I could stop her if she could get someone to lend her a boat.”

“I’m sure I can keep both of you alive on a fishing vessel for a day.” Isabella grinned and Marian regretted the suggestion already.

Which is how Marian found herself three days later boarding a fishing vessel with an extremely excited Merrill and an already smug Isabella. Her smugness came largely from the perfect sailing weather, sunny and a bit windy exactly as she had predicted when they agreed on a day.

“Oh this is exciting!” Merrill was practically dancing on the docks as Isabella got the vessel prepped. “I’ve always wanted to try sailing, it sounds so exciting, or relaxing, or both!”

“How can it be both?” Marian asked. Despite, or perhaps because of, the weather she found herself in high spirits.

“I don’t know, that’s why it’s so exciting!” Merrill grinned at her so Marian was laughing as Isabella jumped onto the deck.

“She’s all ship shape, I’m reasonably confident I can keep you both alive for at least a day. Assuming neither of you has pissed off any gods lately.” She gestured towards the ship. “Step up then, if you’re not throwing up by the time we get out to where it’s choppy you’re buying tonight.”

“I remember.” Marian said as the three of them stepped out onto the boat. It really wasn’t much more than a sailboat but there was room enough for the three of them and a packed lunch.

As they left the docks Marian started to feel nauseous, as she always did traveling between the docks and the Gallows anyway. Then as they left the Gallows behind and hit open sea her nausea faded. The spray on her face and the sun on her back combined in such a way that she was both warm and refreshed. It changed her entire feeling about sailing.

“I’m buying tonight.” Marian grinned up at Isabella who was doing something with the ropes and such that seemed rather complicated.

“Fantastic!”

“Oooh, what’s that!” Merrill leaned out and Marian grabbed her arm reflexively. “Look it’s glittering!”

“Oh kitten, that’s a fish.” Isabella looked torn between laughter and sympathy. “Surely you’ve seen fish before.”

“But it’s so big, it’s like-” She held her hands as far apart as she could get them. “-bigger than that.”

“Well kitten it’s got plenty of room to grow out here.” Isabella grinned and looked out across the sea. Marian followed her gaze and in the distance could just barely make out what had to have been Ferelden. “Even more room way out there, you should see the size of the things that live out in the ocean.”

“I’m not entirely sure I want to.” Marian laughed and leaned back on the little bench she was sitting on. “I like the creatures around me to be smaller if at all possible.”

The next few hours passed quietly enough, chatter inter spaced with quiet contemplation of the sheer amount of water around them. Now that she wasn’t nauseous Marian found the amount of work that Isabella put into sailing the ship extremely entertaining. The result of which was Isabella repeatedly threatening to toss her overboard if she kept touching things. Then Isabella tied the various ropes in complicated knots and took a break for lunch.

On their way back to the docks Merrill let out a string of Dalish and leaned so far over the edge of the boat so quickly that she went straight over the side.

“Hawke!” Isabella dropped the ropes and jumped to where Merrill had fallen out.

“You said not to touch anything.” Marian smirked at her as Merrill’s head popped up out of the water.

“Hawke.” Now she sounded like Aveline and Marian couldn’t help the fact that her smirk grew.

“Nice Aveline impression.” She reached a hand out to Merrill as Isabella started laughing.

“Awe did I miss something dirty again?” Merrill got a little frown as she grabbed Marian’s hand. She looked so upset at the prospect that Marian started giggling, then laughing as Merrill got even more of a pout. Marian was laughing so hard that Merrill kept slipping out of her grasp despite the fact that she weighed about as much as a sparrow.

It took both Isabella and Marian and far longer than it should have to get Merrill back onto the boat because they kept dissolving into giggles. Once Merrill was in the boat they had quite the time trying to explain just why it was all so funny.

 

——

 

Marian pulled the blanket tighter around her shoulders as her eyes tracked across the page of her book. Though significantly quieter than Gamlen’s house Fenris’ mansion was a hell of a lot draftier. Luckily he could be persuaded to add wood to the fire and keep many blankets on hand. The sudden absence of the scrape of stone against sword alerted Marian before Fenris spoke.

“What interest do books hold exactly?” The way he was frowning at her made her think he’d been watching for a while.

“They’re stories, they’re entertaining.” Marian shrugged as she thought about it. “Its a way to sort of escape, you can read about all sorts of heroes in the making or romances or people like you in different scenarios. Of course if you’re a mage there aren’t many stories for you but-”

“There’s a reason for that.”

“Yeah everyone wants mages locked in circles, though I suppose Tevinter might have more novels about mages.” Marian paused for a moment as Fenris frowned thoughtfully. “Anyway it’s a way to escape your world for a while.”

“Is there any truth to them?”

“Sometimes, you can get factual books but most of them have at least a little fiction to them.” She tapped the cover of her book as she spoke. “For instance the books so far that have been written about the Warden and all that, half of them hail her as some Saviour to all and others claim she’s trying to gain power, not to mention the mess of conflicting tales about Ostagar.”

He made a thoughtful noise and looked down at his sword for a moment before gesturing at her book. “What about this one in particular?”

“This?” She lifted it a moment. “It’s one of Varric’s, I’m fairly sure it’s about me.”

“He’s publishing books about you?” Fenris’ frown was deeper than ever, he seemed truly annoyed at the idea.

“Not yet.” Marian flipped the book and showed him the page she was on, all full of crossings out and margin notes. “He’s in the process of writing one though, I’m helping.”

“Helping or snooping?”

“Both.” She gave him a smug sort of smile as he made that quiet noise that was his version of laughter.

 

——

 

“I see your point I really do but just setting all mages free wouldn’t work either!” Marian rubbed at the headache she could feel coming on. She didn't know why she bothered trying to talk to Anders but here she was, trying to talk to Anders.

“You were a free mage!” He gestured at her and immediately she bristled. “Two mages helped the Hero of Ferelden! I don’t know what its go-”

“Don’t talk about things you don’t understand.” She snapped, entirely cutting him off. Bad form really but it wasn’t a formal debate. “I had a teacher, I had someone to show me the dangers and help me learn control. So did both of the Hero’s mage friends, one of them was and still is a circle mage!”

“Yes, well,” He frowned, clearly he knew that one of them was a circle mage and had just been hoping she didn’t. “That doesn’t change the fact that mages are treated terribly.”

“No but setting all mages free wouldn’t work, not with the way things are.” She gestured to encamps all of Thedas. “You’d get people turning left right and center out of fear and anger and who knows what else.”

“So what? We just ignore it?” He looked seconds from going crackly around the edges and Marian made a derisive sound.

“Of course not but you and I have no power in this city, or in any part of Thedas. You have to be somebody to change things here.” That was about the only thing she agreed with Gamlen on.

“So you plan to do nothing.” His voice took on that tired sort of judgment that it often got when he’d decided the person he was talking to couldn’t be ‘reasoned with’.

“On the contrary I intend to do many things.” Marian shrugged. “Top of my list is whatever favors I have to do to get enough coin to get Bartrand's expedition going.”

“So you just plan to do nothing for anyone other than yourself.” Then he frowned slightly like he’d just realized something. “And how in the world would you know if both mages who helped the Hero of Ferelden had teachers? No one knows anything about the second mage except that she appeared at the beginning of the Hero’s quest and promptly disappeared when the archdemon fell.”

“I have it on good authority that she had a teacher.” She smirked slightly at his look of bafflement. “And I heard lots of stories about Wynne, by all accounts she believes in the circles. At least in what they originally stood for.”

He got that irritated frown on his face again and her smirk grew.

“What did you think you were the only one who knows things?”

“It often seems that way.” He directed his glare away from her. “Like I am the only one not so set in my ways that I can’t see what’s coming.”

“Sir?” There was a light sort of knock on the door before Marian could point out the irony in that statement. “Sir it’s my little girl, she’s very ill.”

“I’m sure we can continue this later.” Anders opened the door with a flick of his wrist. “Come on in, let me look at her.”

“One day you’re going to actually listen to the rest of us Anders.” Marian sighed as his new patient looked between them with a mix of confusion and curiosity on their face. “I just hope it won’t be too late.”

 

——

 

“Come on Isabella, if you let me win a few hands off of Varric I might actually get enough coin to go on his mad venture into the deep roads.” Marian gave her her best puppy dog eyes but Isabella just snorted.

“Just learn how to cheat Hawke, it’s what I do.”

“Isabella I can’t even catch you cheating how do you think I’ll be able to cheat well enough to win against you?”

“That is a good point, and flattery will get you everywhere.” Isabella’s voice took a turn for the flirty.

“You two realize I’m right here.” Varric raise his eyebrows at them and Marian just grinned in response.

“Yes but she is much better at flattery than you.” Isabella let out a melodramatic sigh. “The only thing you flatter is that crossbow of yours, and occasionally Hawke.”

“Mostly only in his stories though.” Marian pulled Varric’s book out of her bag and put it down in front of him. “Speaking of, Varric this is no where near what happened, there was no flying on dragon back.”

“Where, how, Hawke what have I told you about going through my things.” He glared at her and then the book like he couldn’t decide who was at fault here.

“Ooooh, a story about Hawke?” Isabella reached out but Varric snatched it away before she could get it.

“An almost entirely fictional story.”

“And whose fault is that?” Varric shrugged as he got up to put the book out of reach. “You won’t tell me anything good.”

“Also if I catch anymore insinuations that I’m interested in Anders I’m tossing your book into my fireplace.” Marian held up a finger warningly as he came back to the table.

“Damn, and he seemed like your type too.” Varric sighed and tapped the edges of his cards on the table.

“Maybe in another world he would be, one where he wasn’t such a dick.”

“Sometimes that’s all you need.” Isabella said with a shrug and a smirk that had Marian groaning.

“Isabella!”

“See Rivaini, I told you.” Varric sighed and put his cards down. “I got squat this hand.”

“You did, yes.” Isabella raised her eyebrows at Marian who handed her cards over. “Another round to me.”

“Shocking to no one who has ever played cards with you.” Marian chuckled trying to ignore the fact that apparently Isabella and Varric discussed her love life.

It was Isabella’s deal and she dealt in silence, though she waggled her eyebrows at Varric every time she tossed him a card.  By the time all the cards were dealt Marian was almost a hundred percent sure they were testing her.

“You know I don’t think she’s going to crack Varric.” Isabella let out another melodramatic sigh. “Perhaps we should just tell her.”

“You know Rivaini I think you may be right.” He looked over his cards and let out an irritable sort of huff. “Why we ever let you deal is beyond me.”

“Rules are rules.” Isabella smirked.

“Right because you’re all about following the rules.” Marian chuckled and managed not to raise her eyebrows when she looked at her hand. It was the best she’d had all night. So either Isabella was letting her win or she was setting her up to loose big.

“I’ve never broken a single rule in my life.” The affront in her voice was so convincing Marian almost believed her.

“Right, you’re the only pirate in the world who actually follows all the rules.” Varric nodded and turned to Marian. “Would you like to know what I told her?”

“You mean about my lack of a love life?” Marian raised an eyebrow.

“Yes that exactly.” Isabella nodded. “Love life, not sex life. Boring really.”

“You should try it sometime, might like it better than you think.” Marian grinned at her.

“So what is your type then? If not Blondie then who?” Varric leaned towards her and Isabella not entirely subtly peered at his cards.

“If you really want to know go bug Carver,” Marian chuckled. “He’s had to deal with me my whole life, he’ll be able to tell you.”

“But you won’t.” Varric sighed almost as melodramatically as Isabella.

“It’s not stories and gossip if you get it from the source, you should know that.” Marian grinned and tapped her cards. “And unless I’m very much mistaken I’m going to win this round.”

“Oh we’ll see about that.” Varric and Isabella both said at the same time.

 

——

 

As Marian counted her last coin back into the little sac she had hidden among her things she started grinning. She had far more than enough coin to bring to Bartrand. It helped her decisions that no one had knocked on the door or asked her for help in weeks and she was getting rather bored anyway. Now all that was left was deciding who would come with her, she had a feeling Bartrand wasn’t going to let her bring everyone.

“Hey Carver?” She called out and after a moment he poked his head in and raised an eyebrow at her. “You’re coming with me to the Deep Roads yeah?”

“Of course, you not thinking of leaving me behind too?” He asked, expression going from casual curiosity to something closer to suspicion.

“Not unless you want to be left.” Marian grinned to hide how much that one extra word stung. “Just wanted your opinions.”

“You can’t bring Merrill.” He said it with such a tone of finality she almost didn’t question it. Almost being the key word of course, she raised her eyebrows at him. “She’d hate it, all closed in and buried.”

“Awww, haven’t you turned into a sweetheart?” Marian grinned as he avoided her eyes. “Anyone else we can’t being because they’d find it a bit unpleasant?”

“Aveline’s to busy, she can’t just take unknown amount of time off of being guard captain.” He said instead of answering her questions. “Did you want to bring Fenris?”

“I was thinking of bringing Anders actually.” She deftly sidestepped that particular line of thought. The one where she ran herself in circles about the pros and cons of having Fenris with her vs the fact that she’d be bringing him down into the Deep Roads. “As he’s a Grey Warden and all.”

“I always forget about that.” Carver nodded. “What with his whole ‘free the mages and damn the consequences’ rants and the Grey Wardens being so partial and all.”

“There is that, he’ll be painful company.” She sighed and stared up at the roof for a moment as Carver snorted.

“And can we trust him?” Carver asked, one eyebrow raised, a look he’d taken straight from Mother’s repertoire. “There is a reason you never bring him out of Darktown.”

“Yes, he’s painful company. Varric seems to like him well enough though.” Marian lifted one shoulder. Trust or not the important part was what he might know, liking or trusting him mattered much less than his potential expertise. “Well we’d best go gather the two of them and tell Bartrand we’ll be coming along then.”

“Let’s.” Carver grinned at her and gestured towards the door. “At least the Deep Roads will probably smell better than this place.”

“Oh it’s not so bad,” Marian snickered as she opened the door. “I think the rat droppings offset the cabbage smell very nicely.”

**Author's Note:**

> If you like what I do and want to buy me a coffee for it there's a link on my profile


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